2013 Where did you go?

Adieu, Farewell, Good-bye, Hate to see you go, Adios, See Ya…..NOT!!

 If you had a year like we had a year you would know why I start this remembrance of 2013 the way I have.   Now don’t get me wrong, no everything in 2013 was bad, then again not everything was good.   Just a brief back ground for those who don’t know me and my back ground.  In 1993 I was rear ended by a drunk driver causing severe lower back damage and over time have been considered disabled and placed on disability, I also am the primary caree for my mother who has COPD and several other medical issues.  Now for 2013, not only did I start on and finish my first full year writing my blog (PickYourPain.org),  throughout the year I also posted blogs on not only my site but Caregiving.com, where I participated in many online chats, MC’d the Men’s Health chat room, administrated the 101 Things to Do, SPOT (Stamp Procrastination Out Today) and a Task A Day (To Bring Cheer Your Way) groups. I  was Co-Host of the Caregiving.com Quiz Show, played Caregiver Solitaire (which I won one month then went down in the year end Champions Round.)  I also provided an ear as a” WAIT Buddy, Phone Buddy” to other caregivers that were waiting for or with a loved one in an ER, surgery center, waiting rooms, etc so they knew someone was there if they needed them.  Over the past year I have also taken on the testing of several medical or caregiving devices and Iphone applications for companies and then will post a blog about their pros and cons.  Just a few of these included, ID My Pill “app,” Simply Health, Back Care “app,” On Time “Medication Reminder” and several others, I look forward to doing more of these in 2014.

 January brought into the family another sister when my older brother finally married his then girlfriend of eight years, we rescued another black lab puppy (3 months old) and my beloved 49ers were in the Super Bowl and lost.  As February rolled in myself and Denise (@Denise) of Caregiving.com were guest on a internet video chat regarding, “What is the Future of Elder Care?,” put on by Huffington Post Live.  Mom was admitted to the Travis AFB Hospital (75 mile drive) for an eight day vacation for COPD and edema backing up on her heart.  My son who serves in the USAF also had to return to base, was home on a two week vacation.

March brought a large number of trips to Travis AFB Hospital for testing and follow up on mom’s condition.  Also, mom takes a tumble in her kitchen and breaks four of her toes and the bones that run across the top of her foot.  We then finished the month and started April with moving Robert my brother in law who has dealt with epilepsy since birth, in with us to ensure he receives the best possible care he can get.  We intended to convert the garage into a full bedroom suite with walk in shower (walker) but when the contractor said with his costs and “ALL” of the fees and permit cost of the city, it would run $30,000 – $35,000 to complete the project, Sorry.  So we are now looking for a new home that meets our needs.  April then ends with mom getting her boot off and a week later breaking her foot again and yes, back on with the brace.

Other than the usual blogs, chats and my doctors appointments, May was the slowest month for us in 2013, other than Robert being admitted again for pneumonia and sepsis.  Here mom was also diagnosed with having acute depression with acute anxiety issues, not something else.   June made up for that, USA Today asked me to join them to discuss my views on caring for my mom who has COPD and edema as well as other medical issues and what I thought would be the future needs for care.   Between us for some reason, we had a lot of appointments (kidney, back, pain, dental, pcp’s, cardiology, neurology, lab work, Coumadin test).

 July brings me accepting to become the Director of Sponsorship for Caregiving.com, along with the next day getting sick for 5 days.  Mom’s appointments continued between McClellan AFB, Travis AFB, the Neurologist and Kidney Specialists and weekly trips to the lab for Coumadin testing.  Mine included the Pain Management Specialist (monthly), pharmacy (3-4 times a month), Massage Therapy (monthly) and Bowen Therapy (2x monthly).  At the end of July first part of  August we tried out a part time in home care agent this month, one that we knew from the previous care facility Robert was in.  This gave me time to get house work done, keep up on day job without stress and gave me and Trish (Robert’s sister.org, my wife) some time to go out and get some mini-respite time.  This lasted until she went to Europe on vacation (the in-home care agent, not my wife) and then we never heard from her.  The appointments between me and mom continued at a dizzying pace.  We then meandered our way into,

September in which our family has six birthdays, our anniversary (17th) and on top of that my Pain Management Clinic was in the process of refilling my internal pain medicine pump and accidentally injected 40ml of Fentynal directly into my stomach causing a “Major” over dose and putting me into the ICU for four days on an IV antidote and then another ten days at home continuing to work it out of my system.  This also required testing of the pump and catheter to confirm both were working.  However only a week after I left the hospital, Robert is put into it again for a week long visit, this with his 3rd bout in ten months for pneumonia and sepsis.  Yes, 3rd time and its not over (spoiler alert).  Then when at 10:30 p.m. I reach down and scratch my ankle I all of a sudden feel liquid running down my foot.  I put my hand down a grip whatever (my ankle) and hobble to the bathroom, upon taking my hand off to inspect a 6″-8″ stream of blood is squirting out of a little hole.  It seems my edema had pushed my blood vessels close to the skins surface and in scratching I happen to nick a vein and open up the flood gates.  On seeing my pcp the next day they decided to with the use of a magnesium stick, cauterize the scratch and then wrap both my legs from the knee down with ace bandage, then a foam sub-layer and finally a few layers of casting wrap and this I had on for four weeks, to push the retained fluids up and hopefully out.   Things picked up again in October with mom having to go to the ER three times, me going once for the edema again and my brothers step son of only 24 years, was running in his first marathon every in San Francisco (only running the 1/2 marathon) when only 15′-20′ from the finish line he did a face plant due to a heart attack. All the doctors on site said if he had not been at the end of the run, did not have all the marathon medical staff and vehicles on site, was not only five miles from SF Medical Center, he would be dead.  To date they are still unsure as to what caused his episode.  Must be, “It runs in the family.” Again, he was running to get ready for this race, his 1st, down to a low boy fat, on 24 years old and he has a heart attack.  Boy was he lucky.

     November took us to Miami for a few days with Myself and Trish (RobertsSister.com and my wife) where we were joined not only by three of my family members who help care for our mom but local Florida area members of Caregiving.com, (@worriedwife, @thepurplejacket and @ejourneys).  It was the start to the first ever Caregiving.com Cruise Vacation were we cruised the Bahamas.   We were joined by Denise Brown (@Denise, mentor to many and the name and  face behind the Caregiving.com web site), Kathy (@kathy, who cares for her husband) and Jane (@jane, who cares for her daughter who has major heart & lung issues) both are bloggers on Caregiving.com.  It was an amazing 4 nights, 6 days of learning more about each other, considering we’ve been speaking on the internet for almost 2-1/2 years and to bring a face to a name, who needs a Christmas gift, mine came early.   Which brings us to December, which went real well, overall.  Robert was again admitted for pneumonia and sepsis this was the shortest stay on record I believe, only four days.  Because of my back issues and Robert being dead weight for lack of a better term, we have to call 911.  The firemen, paramedics and such are getting to know us now to the point Trish had a conversation with one of them regarding our 10-1/2′ Christmas tree.  On top of this the main family was welcomed with three new born’s in the same number of months and a fourth just months away.  We had two great Christmas parties (large and small family), along with a great Christmas dinner with my mom, the girls and their boyfriends, only down fall here was not having Christopher (my son) here, he is stationed in Minot, N. Dakota.  We found the perfect trees, actually it was the first one we walked up to and pulled out, a 10.5′ Douglas Fir for the living room and because of the large number of ornaments we have we grabbed a 6′ Douglas Fir for the family room.  Great holidays all around so it seems as if 2013 is going to end in a positive and will (we hope) keep rolling right into 2014.

Thanks to all of you, my family, friends, readers and listeners near and far.  Thank you for taking the time out of your busy days, which as a caregiver I understand every spare second you find you can be doing 100 something else’s, so I am honored that you take that second to read or listen to me on either PickYourPain.org or Caregiving.com.  I promise to supply you with stories of pain and such and will always do so with humor, because as I always say,

“Pain without Humor is always Painful.”

Please have a respectful, safe, dedicated, fun and humorous 2014.

– Richard K.

PickYourPain@att.net

Richard@caregiving.com